|
喜欢Barbara Park的作品，不仅因为她作为成年人，能够以孩童的视角洞察被大人忽略的情感，还因为作品中充满童趣。当然，英文表达比较简单，也是重要原因之一。下面这段摘自她的“Don't make me smile"一书，是讲述一个十一的岁男孩父母离婚以后，心里成长过程。试着将其翻译过来，权当练手，希望没把韩老师教的忘光，也欢迎各位同学指正。
|
WHEN MY father brought me home that afternoon, I said hello to my mother and went straight to my room. I wasn’t sure why I was in such a hurry to get there. But as soon as I closed my door, I started to cry.
那天下午老爸把我送回家后，我跟老妈打了个招呼就直接回自己房间了。我也搞不清为什么那么着急回房，只是一关上门，就哭了起来。
It was really weird, too. I didn’t even know I was going to do it. And the worst part was, I couldn’t stop.
这样做很不正常，我都不知道自己要哭。而且最糟糕的是，我控制不住自己。
My father was still in the house. He heard me and came in to see what was wrong. I asked him to leave me alone.
老爸还没走，他听见哭声就走进我房间看是怎么回事。我跟他说让我自己待一会儿。
When he left my room, I heard him tell my mother that it might be good for me “to get it out of my system.” They didn’t bother me after that.
他离开房间后，我听见他告诉我妈“让他自己静一静”会对我有好处。然后，他们就再没进来过。
This was the first time that I had cried in almost a week. In fact, until then I hadn’t even felt like crying, hardly. I guess I had been more mad than sad. But after seeing my father’s apartment, it all started sinking in.
在知道他们要离婚这一个星期里，我头一次哭。在此之前我几乎根本没想过要哭。我估计以前更多的是怨恨。但自从看了老爸的公寓后，我才开始感觉伤心、难过。
Every time I thought about it, I cried even harder. I know this makes me sound like a total wuss. But I don’t really care. I think when you’re sensitive, you have more crying in you than other kids.
每次一想起那个破屋子，我就哭得更厉害。我知道这样把我显得像个爱哭的胆小鬼，但我不在乎。我想敏感的孩子，应该比别的孩子更爱哭。
All I know for sure is that when my mother called me for dinner that night, I couldn’t eat a thing. I just sat there looking down at my food and sniffling. It was too bad, too. She had made fried chicken.
那天晚上，当老妈叫我吃晚饭的时候，我什么都吃不下。只是坐在那，看着盘子里的食物抽泣。老妈还做了炸鸡，我都吃不下，让我觉得更糟糕了。
I tried to make her feel good by eating a few bites, but it was no use. I couldn’t swallow. I just sat there with chicken in my cheeks. Finally, Mom told me I could come back later If I was feeling better.
我想吃几口，让她好受点。但是没用，我咽不下去。我就坐在那，嘴里含着鸡肉怎么都咽不下。最后，老妈说等我感觉好点，可以再回来吃。
I went back to my room and cried a little more.
我回到房间，又哭了一会。
That night I must have been cried in my sleep. Because the next morning my pillowcase felt soggy.
那天晚上我肯定在睡着的时候也哭了。因为第二天醒来，枕巾是湿的。
It was Sunday, and there wasn’t much to do. I got up for a while and wandered around the house. But I kept ending back in my room, thinking about my mom and dad.
第二天是周日，没啥事可做。我起来待了会，在家里到处转转。但是最后还是回了自己房间，去想我爸妈的事。
By late that afternoon, my mother was getting worried about me. The only time I had come out of my room was to get more Kleenex. She made me some homemade soup and brought it to my room. It was real nice of her and all. But I couldn’t eat it.
那天下午晚些时候，老妈开始担心我了。因为我那天只走出房间一次，去拿了许多纸巾。老妈亲手给我做了汤，端进我房间。她实在是太好了，汤也很不错。但我还是没喝。
I went to bed early. I thought maybe if I got a good night’s sleep, I would feel better in the morning. But when the morning came, I still felt lousy. My mother must have sensed it, because she let me stay home from school again.
我早早就上床了。我想，如果晚上好好睡一觉，第二天就会好些。但到了第二天早上，还是感觉很低落。老妈一定也看出来了，因为她让我今天待在家，不用上学了。
About nine o’clock, my father dropped by to see how I was doing. At least, I thought that’s why he came by. Actually, he had another reason. And it turned out to be a very sneaky one.
大约九点左右，老爸来看我。至少，我是那么想的。他放心不下，来看看我好些没有。实际上，他来这还有一个原因。后来我才知道，他耍了一个大花招。
“Could you get your clothes in, Charlie?” he asked.
老爸问我：“查理，穿上衣服好吗？”
I shook my head. “No, Dad. Please. I can’t go to school today. I don’t feel good,” I said.
我摇摇头说：“不，爸爸。求你了。我今天不能去上学，我感觉很不舒服。”
Anyone could see that I wasn’t faking.
是个人就能看出来，我可不是假装的。
“I know you don’t, Charlie,” said my father. “But there’s somewhere else I’d like to take you this morning. Just get ready, all right? It’ll be good for you.”
“我知道你不能去上学，查理”老爸说：“但是，我今天上午要带你去别的地方。快去准备吧，好吗？对你会有好处的。”
As I was getting dressed, I convinced myself that he was taking me out to breakfast. For some reason, even if I don’t have an appetite, the thought of blueberry pancakes usually cheers me up a little.
我穿衣服的时候，劝慰自己说他会带我去吃早餐。尽管没有什么胃口，但是一想到蓝莓煎饼，还是让我情绪有所好转。
We drove for several miles. Finally, Dad pulled up in front of a small white building.
我们开了几里地，最后，老爸停在一栋白色的小房子前。
“Come on,” he said, getting out of the truck. “There’s someone in here I’d like you to meet.”
“到了，”他说。我们下了车，以后他说：“我想让你见一个人。”
It didn’t look much like a restaurant. I was getting suspicious.
这房子看起来不像是餐馆呀。我开始起了疑心。
My father and I went inside and headed down a long, narrow hall. When we were almost to the end, he stopped in front of one of the offices.
我们走进房子，走过一个狭长的通廊，快到头儿的时候，停在一间办公室前。
“Well, this is the place,” he said.
他说：“好了，就是这儿了。”
I looked at the sign on the door. It said:
DR.HENRY T.GIRARD
Child Psychologist
我看了一下门上的牌子，上面写着：
儿童心理医生
享利。吉拉德
A shrink? Oh no. Not a shrink! I couldn’t believe he brought me here.
精神病医生？ 噢，不！我真不敢相信，老爸带我来这看精神病医生！
“Why, Dad? Why did you do this? What a sneaky trick?” I said.
我说：“爸爸，为什么？你为什么这么做？你耍我呢是吗？”
I started to back up, but my father grabbed me by the arm.
我开始向后退，但老爸紧紧抓住我的胳膊。
“Just talk to him one time, Charlie. That’s all I’m asking,” he said. “He can help you feel better. I know he can. If you don’t want to come back after today, you won’t have to.”
“查理，就跟他谈一次，好吗？我就要你跟他谈一次。”老爸说。“他能帮助你，让你感觉好一些。我知道他行。如果今天谈完后，你不想再来，就可以不来了。”
Quickly, he pushed open the door. The secretary at the desk looked up and smiled.
他很快推开门。桌边坐着的女秘书抬起头来看着我们，微笑致意。
“Good morning, Mr. Hickle,” she said cheerfully. “This must be Charles.”
“早上好，Hickle先生。”她欢快地说：“这一定是查尔斯吧？”
My father nodded. “Is Dr. Girard ready to see him?”
老爸点点头。“他可以进去见吉拉德医生吗？”
“Yes. He can go right in,” she said. She pointed to a door across the room.
“是的。他现在就可以进去。”秘书说。她用手指着房间对面一扇门说。
Dad knocked twice, opened the door, and gave me a nudge. “I’ll be out here if you need me,” he said.
老爸走到门边，敲了两下。然后打开门，推了我一把，说：“我就在外面等。”
Dr. Girard was sitting at his desk. He wasn’t very old for a doctor. When he stood up to greet me, I could see that he was wearing faded jeans and a sweater. I don’t know why, but that really surprised me. I didn’t think doctors are allowed to wear jeans to work.
吉拉德医生坐在桌子旁。做为一名医生来说，他可不算老。他站起来跟我打招呼的时候，我看见他穿着褪色的牛仔裤和羊毛衫。这可真出乎我的意料，我以为医生们在看病的时候必须穿白大掛呢。
“Hi, Charlie,” he said, smiling. “I’m Henry Girard.”
“嗨，查理”他微笑着说：“我是享利。吉拉德。”
I didn’t smile back. As a matter of fact, I didn’t even say hello. I just sort of stood there feeling like a fool. I still couldn’t believe that I was talking to a child psychologist. It made me feel all weird inside. Like I was a nutcase or something.
我可没笑着回应。事实上，我都不想打招呼。我感觉站在那有点像白痴。我到现在还不能相信，自己在跟一个儿童心理医生讲话。难道我内心不正常，像个疯子还是什么？
“Please, sit down,” said Dr. Girard.
吉拉德医生说：“请坐。”
I sat.
我坐了下来。
He sat, too.
他也坐下来。
“Do you know why your father brought you here today?” he asked.
他问：“你知道为什么今天你父亲带你到这来吗？”
“Not until you serve pancakes,” I said. “I thought he was taking me out to breakfast.”
“直到看到你这没有煎饼才知道”我说。“我以为他带我出来吃早餐呢。”
Girard laughed. “Sorry,” he said. “But I have a hard time just making cereal.”
吉拉德医生笑了。“不好意思，这可没煎饼”，他说：“我做麦片都费劲。”
“Yeah, that’s what I afraid of,” I told him.
我说：“是啊。我就是怕这样。”
“Oh, believe me, Charlie,” he said. “There’s nothing here to afraid of. Your dad just brought you here because he knows that you’re really unhappy right now. And he’s hoping that maybe I can help.”
“噢，相信我，查理”他说：“这儿没什么可怕的。你爸带你来这，是因为他知道你现在非常不开心。他希望我能够帮助你。”
I didn’t reply. I didn’t know what I was supposed to say. I had never been a nutcase before.
我没吭气。我不知道该怎么回答。我以前从来没看过精神病。
Dr. Girard sat down in his chair. “So do you want to tell me what’s going on at home?” he asked.
吉拉德医生坐进椅子里，说：“你想告诉我家里发生了什么事吗？”
“No, not really,” I said.
“不，不想”我说。
I wasn’t trying to be rude. It just felt weird talking to some strange man I didn’t even know. I mean, all you life your parents go around telling you not to talk to strangers. Then all of a sudden, they decide to get a divorce, and boom….they dump you in some strange guy’s office and they expect you to spill your guts out.
我不想表现得没礼貌。但是和一个从未谋面的陌生人谈心，让我感觉很诡异。我是说，从小到大，你父母一直告诉你，不要和陌生人讲话。结果，突然地，他们决定要离婚，然后，砰的一下，他们把你弄到一个陌生家伙的办公室，还指望你跟这个人大吐苦水。
I looked around some more. “Where’s the couch?” I said. “Aren’t crazy people supposed to lie down on a couch when they talk to you?”
我故意四处张望。问：“病床在哪？来看病的疯子不都应该躺在疯床上和你说话吗？“
Dr. Girard laughed again. “Well, I don’t get many ‘crazy’ people in this office,” he said. “But you are not the only one who thinks that you have to be ‘crazy’ to come here. At first, almost everyone I see thinks that.”
吉拉德医生又笑了。“好吧。我的办公室里可没有‘疯子’”他说：“但不是只有你一个人以为只有‘疯子’才来这看病。几乎每个人刚到这的时候，都这么想。”
I had to admit, the guy was trying to be understanding. But even so, he was still a stranger.
我得承认，这个家伙说到我心坎上了。但即使这样，他还是个陌生人。
“It probably feels funny talking to a stranger about your problem, doesn’t it?” he said next.
他又说：“你可能觉得和一个陌生人谈自己的麻烦，很可笑，是吧？”
Great. Now he was reading my mind.
好啊。现在他来搞什么读心术了。
“I promise you, Charlie. You won’t have to tell me anything that you don’t want to,” he said. “In fact, all I would like for you to do is answer one small question for me. It’s a question I ask all my patients. Are you ready?”
“查理，我答应你。你不想告诉我的，可以不说。”他说：“实际上，我想让你做的，就是回答一个小小问题。这个问题我会问每个来这的病人。准备好了吗？”
I nodded.
我点点头。
“Okay, here’s the question,” he said. “How do I look?”
“好，这个问题是”他说：“你觉得我今天怎么样？”
Geez. What a stupid thing to ask.
天哪。这是个什么蠢问题。
I didn’t answer. If you ask me, answering a stupid question is almost as stupid as asking it.
我没回答。如果你问我为什么，我会告诉你。回答这么个蠢问题，那就和问这个问题一样傻。
Dr. Girard stared at me.
吉拉德医生盯着我看。
“I’m serious, Charlie. How do I look?” he asked again.
“我是认真的，查理。我看去怎么样？”他又问了一遍。
I was going to try to outstare him, but I figured he was probably a lot better at staring than I was. After all, he got o stare at people all day long. So finally, I gave in and answered the stupid question.
我想和他对着盯。但估计他肯定比我厉害。毕竟，他整天都盯别人啊。所以，最后我妥协了，回答了这个蠢问题。
“You look fine,” I said. “Can I go now?’
“你看上去不错”我说：“现在我可以走了吗？”
Dr. Girard laughed some more. For a guy who worked with nutcases all day, he sure laughed a lot.
吉拉德又笑了几声。做为一个整天和疯子打交道的人，他肯定总要笑。
“Do you think you could be a little clearer?” he said. “I mean, do I look happy to you? Or depressed? Or mad? How do you think I look?”
“你能再说清楚点吗？”他说：“我是指，在你看来，我是高兴，是沮丧，还是生气？你怎么认为？”
I shrugged my shoulders. “I don’t know. I guess you look happy.”
我耸耸肩膀，说：“我不知道。我想应该是高兴吧。”
“You are right,” he said. “I’m happy.”
“你说对了”他说：“我是高兴。”
Well, goody-goody for you, I thought. Why was he acting like such an idiot all of a sudden? Personally, I didn’t care whether he was happy or not. All I wanted to do was get out of there.
好吧，我想，伪君子。为什么他突然之间表现得像个白痴？对于我来说，才不管他高兴不高兴呢。我想要做的，就是赶快离开这里。
Dr. Girard kept talking. “The thing is, though, I wasn’t always as happy as I am right now. As a matter of fact, Charlie, when I was your age, I was just about the most miserable kid that you’ve ever seen in your life.”
吉拉德继续说：“其实我不总像现在这样高兴。事实上，查理，当我和你一样大的时候，过得超级悲惨压抑，估计你都没见过。”
I knew he was setting me up. He wanted me to ask him why he used to be miserable. I tried not to, too. But my curiosity got the best of me.
我知道他在跟我使诈。他想让我问他，为什么当时他会那样。我也使劲忍着不去问，但是我的好奇心出卖了我。
“Okay. I give up,” I said. “Why were you miserable?”
“好吧，我认输”我说：“你为什么那么悲惨？”
“For the exact same reason that you are,” he said. “I was miserable because my parents told me they were getting divorced.”
“跟你一模一样的原因”他说：“因为我父母告诉我，他们要离婚。”
I should have known he was going to say that. He was trying to find a way to get me to talk about my own situation. It was sneaky, I thought. But it wouldn’t work.
我应该想到，他会这么说的。他想让我感觉同病相连，然后跟他倾诉衷肠。这种鬼把戏，我才不会上当呢。
“As a matter of fact,” continued Dr. Girard, “I was so unhappy about the divorce that I did something pretty strange.”
“实际上”他接着说：“他们离婚让我非常不开心，我做了些离谱的事儿。”
Once again, my curiosity got to me. What could he have done that was any stranger than the thing I had done? What was stranger than going to live in a tree?
我的好奇心又一次占了上锋。他做了什么事能比我做的更离谱？能比住在树上更离谱？
“So what did you do?” I asked.
我问：“那你做了什么？”
“I stopped to speaking to my parents,” he said.
他说：“我不和我父母讲话。”
I rolled my eyes. That was it? He honestly thought that not speaking to your parents was strange?
我白了他一眼。那算什么？他真以为，不和父母讲话算多么离谱吗？
“No offense, Dr. Girard,” I said. “But what’s such a big deal about not speaking to your parents? I stop speaking to my parents all the time.”
“我不想冒犯您，吉拉德医生”我说：“但不和父母讲话有什么大不了？我经常不和他们讲话。”
“For a whole year, Charlie?” he asked. “I didn’t speak to either one of my parents for a year. Not one word.”
“查理，一整年吗？”他问。“我跟他们谁都不讲话，一年的时间。一个字儿都不说。”
Now I felt insulted.
现在我感觉被他戏弄了。
“Oh, come on,” I said. “I’m not some dumb little kid, you know. I understand what you’re trying to do here. You’re trying to get me to talk by making up a bunch of wild stories. No one can stop speaking to their parents for an entire year.”
“切，得了吧。”我说。“我可不是三岁小孩儿。我知道你现在要干什么。你要编一堆瞎话来骗我和你谈心。没人可以一整年不和自己父母说话的。”
Dr. Girard leaned over his desk and looked me straight in the eye.
吉拦德医生从桌子边弯下腰，直直看着我的眼睛。
“One….whole…year,” he said again.
“一——整——年”他又说了一遍。
This time, I could tell he wasn’t kidding.
这次我可以断定他说的是真的。
“But that’s impossible,” I said. “How could anyone stop talking for a whole year?”
“但是不可能啊”我说：“一个人怎么可以一年不说话呢？”
“Wait. Hold it. I didn’t say that I stopped talking, completely,” he said. “I said that I stopped talking to my parents. I talked to everyone else just fine. My friends, teachers…everybody, except Mom and Dad.”
“哎，等等。我不是指一句话不说”他说：“我是说不和我父母讲话。我和别的人都说的好好的。和朋友、老师。。。所有人，除了我爸妈。”
“Wow,” I said. “My mom and dad get mad if I calm up for even a couple of days. What did your parents do?”
“哇哦”我说：“如果我几天不和他们说话，我爸妈都得疯了。你父母怎么做的？”
“They did what your father did today,” he said. “They took me to a child psychologist. In fact, they took me to a bunch of psychologists. But it didn’t do any good. I was a very stubborn kid. I would talk to the psychologists as friendly as could be. Then I’d go home and not say another word.”
“他们就像你爸今天带你这样”他说：“他们带我去看儿童心理医生。其实，他们带我看了一堆医生，但是一点用都没有。我当时很固执，和心理医生们谈话非常友好。但一回到家，就一个字都不说。”
This was unbelievable. “So let me get this straight,” I said. “You didn’t say one single word to your parents at all? Nothing? Never? ”
这太不可思议了。“所以，我搞清了”我说：“你和父母一个字都不说？啥都不说？从来不说？”
Dr.Girard shook his head. “Nope. I mean once in a while, when they asked me a question, I would shake my head yes or no, but that’s about it. I never opened my mouth. Not even at Christmas.”
吉拉德摇摇头。说：“不。当他们问我什么事的时候，我会摇头或点头，但仅此而已。我从来不张嘴讲话，甚至圣诞节的时候也不讲。”
“So you didn’t ask for any presents?” I asked. This guy was amazing.
“所以你都不要圣诞节礼物？”我问道。这家伙太帅了。
“Not one,” he said. “And believe me, that turned out to be a big mistake.”
“一件都不要”他说：“不过，听我说，那么做其实是个大错误。”
“Why? What happened?” I asked.
“为什么？怎么啦？”我问
“Well, that Christmas I really wanted a basketball hoop and a stereo,” he said. “but since I wasn’t speaking, no one knew it, I thought about writing a Christmas list on a piece of paper, but I decided that would be almost like talking, so I didn’t do it.
“哎。那个圣诞节，我其实特想要一个篮球圈和一个立体声收音机”他说。“但是因为我不说，没人知道我的想法。我本来想把这些礼物列在一张纸上，但我觉得那就相当说话了。所以我没写。”
“Anyway,” he continued, “when I got up on Christmas morning, all I founded under the tree was a game of Life, a ton of school clothes, and some handmade mittens.”
他接着说：“反正，圣诞的早晨，我起来后，在圣诞树下，只找到一张游戏碟。一堆衣服和几副手工织的连指手套。”
I started to laugh.
我笑了起来。
“Wait. That’s not the worst part,” said Dr.Girard. “My mother put fruit in my stocking. Two oranges and an apple. She knew I’d hate that. I’m sure that’s why she did it.”
“等等，那还不是最糟糕的”吉拉德说。“我妈妈把水果放进圣诞袜里。两只橙子和一只苹果。我确信她知道我讨厌吃那些才放进去的。”
I laughed even louder.
我笑得更响了。
“Take it from me, Charlie,” he said. “If you ever decide to stop talking to your parents for any length of time, wait until after the holidays.”
“接受我的教训，查理。”他说。“你一旦打算不和父母讲话，不管时间多长，都等过了圣诞节再说。”
“Don’t worry,” I said. “I could never last as long as you did. I always think of too many mean things that I want to say to them.”
“别担心”我说。“我绝不会像你支撑得那么久。我总能想起许多恶毒的话来对他们说。”
Dr.Girard nodded. “Well, sometimes, that’s okay.” he said. “Sometimes it’s better to say what’s on your mind even if it’s mean——than to keep everything inside.”
吉拉德点点头。“好。有时候，那样也好。”他说“有时候，把你的想法说出来，就算很恶毒，也比装在心里不说要好”
I shrugged. “I don’t know,” I said. “I’ve said plenty of mean things to them already, but it doesn’t seem to be helping me that much. I still feel just as rotten as I did when they first told me. Maybe even rottener.”
我耸耸肩膀，说：“我不知道。我已经向他们说了很多了。但是说了也没什么用。我还是觉得跟他们刚告诉我时那么难受。可能说完了更难受。”
The doctor thought a minute. “Tell me something, Charlie. When did you first find out about the divorce?” he asked.
医生想了一会，问：“告诉我，查理。你什么时候知道离婚这事的？”
“Last Sunday night,” I said.
我说：“上周日晚上。”
Dr. Girard looked surprised. “Last Sunday night? But that was only a week ago.”
医生有点惊讶。“上周日晚？只是一周前嘛。”
“Yes, I know,” I said. “It’s been a whole week, and I feel just as bad now as I did then.”
“是的，我知道。”我说。“已经整整一周了，我感觉和刚开始一样糟糕。”
He leaned forward. “But that’s what I’m trying to tell you, “ he said. “A week is no time at all, Charlie. If you’re thinking that you should feel better in only a week, you’re in for a very unpleasant surprise. It takes time to get over something as big as this. Lots of time.”
他又向下弯弯身子。说：“可是，那就是我想要告诉你的。”他说：“一周时间根本不算啥，查理。如果你觉得一周就能好的话，那你可就要非常失望了。像这种大事是需要时间来恢复的，很长时间。”
“I understand that, Dr. Girard,” I said. “But every day I seem to feel even sadder than the day before. I think I’m getting worse instead of better.”
“我能理解，吉拉德医生。”我说：“但是我每天都感觉比前一天还难过。我觉得不是越来越好而是越来越差。”
He shook his head. “Let me try to explain something to you,” he said. “What if lat Sunday night, instead of finding out about the divorce, you’d had an accident. Let’s say that you fell off your bike and you broke your arm. Okay?”
他摇了摇头。“我来给你解释一下。”他说：“如果上周末晚上，你不是听说离婚，而是出了点事故。比方说，你从自行车上摔下来，胳膊断了。好吗？”
“Okay,” I said.
“好”我说。
“Well, if last Sunday night you fell off your bike and broke your arm. Would you expect it to be healed by today?”
“好，如果上周末晚上，你从自行车上摔下来，把胳膊摔断了。你会指望今天就好了吗？”
“No,” I said.
“不会”我说。
“No, of course you wouldn’t,” he said. “Because you know that broken bones take lots of time to heal. But what a lot of people don’t know is that there is another part of us that can take even longer to heal than broken bones. And that is our emotional part, Charlie. Our hurt, broken feelings.”
“对，当然不会”他说：“因为你知道，胳膊断了需要很长时间才能痊愈。但很多人都不知道的是，我们身体里有另外一个部位痊愈的时间比断了骨头还要长。那就是我们的情感部分，查理。我们受伤、受挫的感情。”
I signed. “No. you don’t get it, Dr. Girard,” I said. “It’s not just my feelings that are hurt. This is a lot worse than that. Hurt feelings happen when your father puts his chef’s hat on his hand instead of his head. I can get over stuff like that. I do it all the time.”
我叹了口气。“不，你不知道。吉拉德医生。”我说：“我受伤的不只是感情。比那还要糟很多。当你爸把你送的厨师帽拿在手里，而不是戴在头上时，感情就受伤了。这样的问题我都克服了，我一直都在克服这些。”
Dr. Girard looked puzzled. But I didn’t feel like explaining the chef’s hat thing, so I kept on going.
医生让我给弄蒙了。但我现在不想解释厨师帽的事，所以继续说。
“My parents are ruining my whole life,” I said. “It’s like they’ve wrecked every part of it. And nothing will ever be the same again.”
“我父母毁掉了我的全部生活。”我说“他们毁掉了每一部分。所有的事都不能再像从前那样了。”
“Like what?” asked Dr. Girard.
“比如说呢？”吉拉德医生问
“Like everything,” I said. “You ought to know. Like the three of us never take a vacation together again. And on Christmas morning, it will only be Mom and me. And whenever I have something special to tell my dad, I’ll have to call him on the phone. Before, when I had something to tell him, I used to just listen for the sound of his truck pulling into the driveway after work. But I can’t do that anymore. Because he won’t be coming home anymore.”
“比如，每件事。”我说“你应该知道的。比如我们三口人再也不能一起渡假了。比如圣诞节的早上，只有我和妈妈了。比如无论什么时候我想告诉爸爸一些特别的事，只能打电话在电话里说了。以前，我想要告诉他什么，只要在他下班时坐在屋里听着他的车开进车道里就行了。但是我再也不能那么做了，因为，他再也不会回家了。”
“It doesn’t seem fair, does it, Charlie?” said Dr. Girard quietly. “You’re not the one who caused any of this, but you’re the one who’s feeling all the hurt.”
“这不公平，对吗，查理？”吉拉德说：“不是因为你他们才离婚，但你必须承担由此带来的伤害。”
Suddenly, I felt tears coming into my eyes. It’s embarrassing as anything to cry in front of strangers. I kept my head down so he couldn’t see.
突然，我觉得眼泪流了出来。在陌生人面前流泪很丢脸，所以我低下头，这样他就看不到了。
“Do you have a kleenex?” I asked. “I think there’s something in my eye.”
“您这有纸巾吗？”我问。“我想是眼睛里进东西了。”
Dr. Girard handed me a whole box of tissues off his desk. I blew my nose.
吉拉德医生从桌上拿起一盒纸巾递给我。我擤了擤鼻涕。
“I must be catching a cold,” I said.
“我肯定是感冒了”我说。
Finally, I looked up. “So how much time do you think it will take before I feel better?”
然后，我抬起头看着他，说：“那么你认为我得多长时间才能好呢？”
“I won’t kid you, Charlie,” he said. “It’s not going to be quick. But there are certain things that you can do to help speed things along.”
“不骗你，查理”他说。“不会太快的。但你可以做些事，这样能让你好得快一点。”
“Like what?” I asked.
“比如？”我问
“Like telling your parents what you’re thinking, and not keeping your feelings all locked up inside of you like I did,” he said. “Keeping everything in only makes it hurt worse.”
“比如可以把你的想法告诉你父母，不要把情感都闷在心里，就像当年我那样”他说。“把情感封锁在心里只会让心更痛。”
“Yeah, well, like I told you before, I’ve already said some pretty mean stuff.”
“嗯，好。但是我之前告诉过你，曾经对他们讲过很多恶毒的话。”
“I know. But remember,” he said, “there’s a big difference between ‘telling’ your feelings and ‘yelling’ your feelings. Eventually, you’re going to need to start talking to your parents more calmly about things, Charlie. Calmly, but honestly.”
“我知道。但是记住。”他说。“你要把情感倾诉出来而不是吼出来，这两者有很大不同。最终，你要心平气和地跟你父母谈话，查理。平静地，坦诚地谈。”
He stood up. “I’m here everyday. Monday through Friday, plus most Saturdays. If you ever want to talk to me again, just give me a call and we’ll set it up. I mean it, okay? You can call me anytime.
他站起来，说：“周一到周五加上大多数周六，我每天都在这上班。如果你还想同我谈，打个电话就行，然后咱们约时间。我是说真的呢。好吗？你随时可以打电话。”
He reached out to shake my hand. Whenever a grown-up shakes my hand, it always makes me self-conscious. I never know how hard I’m supposed to squeeze. If you squeeze too tight, a lot of grown-up will make some dumb comment, like, “Wow, that’s a quite a grip you’ve got there, tiger!” I hate it when they do that.
他伸出手来同我握手。每当大人和我握手的时候，总让我拿不定主意。我从来不知道该用多大的劲去握。如果握得太紧，很多大人就会非常夸张地称赞，比如：“哇。你真有劲，小老虎。”我讨厌他们这么说。
Anyhow, this time I must have squeezed just right, because Dr.Girard didn’t comment at all.
但是，这次，我肯定力度刚好。因为吉拉德医生根本就没那么称赞我。
When I left the office, the secretary gave me a card with his number on it. I shoved it in my pocket.
我离开办公室，女秘书给我一张名片，上面有医生的电话号码。我把名片塞进口袋里。
My father came over and put his arm around me. We walked outside to the truck.
老爸走上来，搂住我。我们走出去，来到车边。
“So how did it go?” he asked. “Are you still mad at me for bringing you?”
“怎么样？”他问。“你还生气我带你来这吗？”
At first, I wasn’t going to speak to him. But then I thought about what Dr.Girard had said about honesty.
开始，我不想和他说话。但是，我想起了医生告诉我的，要坦诚。
“I think it was really rotten for you to bring me here without telling me, Dad” I said. “At least you could have been honest about it. I thought you were taking me out to breakfast.”
“老爸，你不告诉一声就带我来这，真烦人。”我说。“至少你要实话实说呀。我还以为你要带我出来吃早饭呢。”
My father knew I was right. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I know I should have told you, but I was afraid you wouldn’t come.”
老爸知道我说的对。“很抱歉”他说。“我知道，应该先告诉你一声。但是，我怕告诉你你就不来了。”
True. Very true. But I didn’t admit it.
对。非常对。肯定不来。但是我不承认。
“Listen,” he said. “It’s still not too late for some breakfast. Why don’t we go over to my apartment and I’ll fix some scrambled eggs.”
“听着”他说：“现在吃早饭还不算太晚。咱们到我那，我给你做点炒蛋吃怎么样？”
I couldn’t let him off too easy. “No, thanks,” I said. “I have a hard time eating over there.”
我可不想让他得逞。“不，谢谢”我说。“我在那吃饭心理有障碍。”
Dad drove me home without saying another word. When I got inside, I went straight to my room. I didn’t cry or anything this time. though. Instead, I took out Dr. Girard’s card and looked at it.
老爸啥也没说，开车把我送回家。我进屋后，直接回到自己房间。这次，我没有再哭或怎么着。反倒拿出吉拉德医生的名片，仔细地看。
If any of my friends ever saw it, they just wouldn’t understand.
如果我的朋友们看到这一幕，一定不能理解。
I walked to my wastebasket and tore it up.
我走到废纸篓旁，把名片撕碎。
Before I did, I memorized the number.
在撕掉前，我把上面的号码牢牢记住了。
翻译:王悦
王悦
2012-10-17
天之聪教育
457次
点赞(0)
收藏
登录
